I started baking the day after my brother brought over a loaf of bread he'd baked following Jim Lahey's NYT no-knead recipe. Working with dough has always intimidated me, but this was supposed to be the easy-to-follow, idiot proof recipe that would turn out a quality loaf of bread on par with most bakeries. The idea that with a pinch of yeast and a lot of time, I could turn flour, water, and salt into delicious bread was alluring.
To start, I tried to make a simple country loaf, and it was a gloppy mess. I had no idea what I was doing. The next day, I adjusted the recipe, used less water and that loaf turned out pretty good. Crispy crust, soft crumb. My wife and I ate the bread with dinner and marveled at the alchemy of a few simple ingredients.
Every day, I baked a loaf of bread adjusting the hydration, oven temperature, baking time, flour ratios. I used different baking vessels, different types of flour. Although there were lots of variables I could control or try to control, there were a lot of things I couldn't. And even when I thought I did everything the same as last time, my results varied wildly. Baking bread, I was discovering, could teach me patience and acceptance.
On January 7th, I shared on Twitter that I'd incorporated baking into my self-care practice. For most of my life, I struggled to manage my emotions. At my lowest, I experienced suicidal ideation and crippling anxiety. With baking, I found a way to channel my psychic chaos into a meditative practice that not only kept me present but also nourished.
After a few successful rounds of bread baking, I shared with my Twitter followers that if anybody lived in Austin, I would be more than happy to bake them a loaf of fresh bread. In fact, by allowing me to do this, I said, they would be doing me a favor. I needed to bake. Within a few hours, I already had half a dozen orders.
And that's how this all started. I continue to bake for family and friends, I experiment with different recipes, and I document how baking continues to be my therapeutic act. You can follow me on Instagram or Twitter, and if you're ever in Austin, please say hi and I'll bake you a loaf <3